I am not feeling well and kinda exhausted. This always happen to me, blame pms! And mom, she called me and talk about something that long forgotten.

Maybe my mood is not at it's best but care to run a checklist, just to remind my self that i am..

Not becoming one grumpy young lady. CHECKED.
Not doing anything not-right. CHECKED.
Not complaining about every things. CHECKED.
Not feeling any needs to be attached to someone. CHECKED.
Laugh as much as crying. CHECKED.
Buy any thing i like. CHECKED.
Do plan but not making any specific one. CHECKED.
Not thinking too much and just enjoying life to the fullest. CHECKED.

...and i feel good, again.

I went looking for flower and kinda willing to pay up to hundred bucks for sakura-look alike? Was i out of my mind! Who knows what had happened to my brain. No wonder laa.. It is day 8th of the month today..hear this - I hated 8.

I am tired.. My two days course ended today. I went to Jalan TAR and Sogo. I don't know what has gotten into me lately but i became a fan of dining sets and stuffs for home. Maybe i am ready to own a house? Is it? If that's the case, i might able to make it happen after one or two years. But..buying a house is not as simple as buying cars. I could still dream, plan and think about it till the day it happen.

I am thinking about MAGGI mee.. The yumm yummy delicious mee. Again, thanks to MAGGI for creating something that i always can think of when my stomach 'calls' or when i dont have idea on what to eat.

I called my mom while having breakfast at old town white coffee, while waiting for AF1 and mr B to pick me up and 'moblogging' at the same time. And my stomch.. Ermm.. Toil-et maybe!

Bukan takat rambut aku je yang gugur.. Bulu mata aku ni pun, within this week tiap-tiap hari gugur. Aku pun tak paham. Orang kata mungkin ada orang rindu kalau bulu mata jatuh.. Apa-apa la pun orang nak kata.. janji mata aku tak botak.

Letih betul hari ni.. Letih makan banyak.. Hehe. Floor aku ada buat jamuan raya..seronot! Ada makna aku seronot tu sebenarnya.. Ngehehe.. Biarla rahsia ;)

Home alone the whole day.. Heaven! Nothing is more relaxing other than spending my precious time at home, as always. I am watching world cafe Asia on Travel&Living Channel at the moment. Watching peoples all around Asia preparing their dishes kinda moved me. Cooking is art. Just add in whatever i like, as long as the proportions are right. The goal ; 1st goes to aesthetic. I wouldn't want to try something that look 'ugly' kay. Love always starts from the eye, remember ;)

I am planning a trip to Japan or Europe next year, which i have not decided yet. I couldn't make it this year and hoping i could make it next year. I talked with ibu about Japan. Well.. I don't want to say much.. Just wait till it happen loh.

..trying to recall what i did today.. Mmm.. Nothing much.

Yesterday my bos gave us something to think about. How to design a 14 degrees room @ 50% relative humidity. Hua hua hua.. Come again?! He even handed me a book.."read this during weekend" he said. Hahaha.. Did i read it yet? Naah..

Hello sushi!! I've been wanting to eat at sushi Z for so long. The place was always full and i could see a long queue everytime i passed by. I went there with ibu. I have already eaten so i cant try ALL! I am going again..that time i will make sure i go there with an empty stomach.

I'm not missing you...

Every words of this song are so meaningful to me... try to listen to her live performance.. superb! even better than her studio version..

I'm not missing you...
(Stacie Oricco)

Been through just about everything that I could go through
When it comes to relationships
Don't know what I was missing or why I ain't listen
When I told myself that was it
Now here I go, hurt again
Cause of my curiosity
Now that its over
What else could it be he just had to cheat

I made a promise never to settle
Why didn't I keep it?
'Cause I hated the heartbreak
Crying and cheating, the fooling around

But.. I'm not missing you
I'm not going through the motions
Waiting and hoping you call me
I'm not missing you
You might have had me open
But I must be going because
I got life to do
I know I'm usually hanging on
I used to hate to see you gone
But this time its different
I don't even feel the distance
I'm not missing
I'm not missing you

Its a shame in a way cause
I feel that I may not ever find the right one for me
Did I leave him, is he right in front of my face oh
Will my true love ever be?
Why would I go on a search again
When I know what the end will be
What good is love when it keeps on hurting me?

I made a promise never to settle
Why didn't I keep it?
'Cause I hated the heartbreak
Crying and cheating, the fooling around

No I can't be with you
Cause I'm scared felt like I was falling when you left me
I can't keep going through life
Unaware of what I missed
And the person I could be
Love's good when its right
And when it's left in your memory
All the times I let you down
I guess love will be nice for someone else's life

Amat bosan hari ni. Aku rasa aku tak buat apa2 pun. Aku turun lunch. Ingat nak pegi kotak merah.. tapi Dauz pula tak der. Pas kfc, aku tersinggah dekat kedai OTO.. nampak basikal senaman. Aku dah mula dah nak stat membeli belah. Tengah aku terai berbasikal dengan gumbiranya.. lalu la sekumpulan geng yang one of them pernah pegi induksi dengan aku. Aku ingat dorang lalu jek, siap masuk dalam kedai pulak. Tapi aku dengan selamba tetap mengayuh basikal yang tak bergerak kemana pun tu walaupun aku berbaju kurung. Tak la tak seneyeh pun.. aku jenis yang sentiasa pakai seluar panjang aper walopun aku pakai baju kurung. Sebab? Senang nak lari kalau anjing kejar.

Pastu aku g AIBI pula. Kat situ pun aku mengayuh juga. Kedai tu lagi dekat amat dengan pintu entrance opis aku, tapi aku nak juga kayuh! Esok la baru aku decide.. so aku naik opis. Buka2 komputer, ader 2 sms dari 2 nombor yang nama penghantarnya tak keluar. Aku pakai simkad tu tuk online, even orang boleh call tapi aku tak akan dengar or tahu yang ader call masuk, boleh terima sms je. Cek2.. laa.. fasi2 aku time induksi rupanya ajak g kotak merah. Laaa.. patut pun aku ada rasa2 macam nak masuk kotak tadi. Jauh dorang ni merantau sampai ker midvali...

Since time tu da pukul 1 lebih, aku tak la join. Da tu dorang kater nak p panjat opis aku melawat. Bila aku tanya, dorang ader program ker sampai datang ke midvali.. dorang kater buat lawatan susualan budak2 induksi ari tu. Bila aku macam tak caya, incik tu kater.. tu la.. bebudak lain yang kena lawat tu pon samer gak tak perchaiya cam ngko.. ahahah..

This is a story of a friend of mine yang aku kenal time2 keje ni la... Dipendekkan cerita, mamat ni selalu sms, call.. aku layan je la as kawan time2 aku rajin & bila time aku malas which is most of the time, aku masuk la nombor tepon dia dia dalam senarai blacklist aku (opps!), esp bila dia stat nak ala2 sayang menyayang kunun. & bila dia ajak keluar, ada2 je alasan aku. Kalau takat budak-budak dekat opis ni aku tak de hal nak lepak sama dorang, tapi kalau keluar dengan someone yang aku pun kenal gitu-gitu je.. memang rasa tak selesa so aku tak pernah kuar dengan dia langsung. Lagipun dia ni jenis yang macam too good to be true.. which is satu attitude ‘kurang real’ yang aku cukup tak gemar especially pada lelaki. Be yourself and act normal kay guys!

Story of the day.. I arrived safely at Nilai, thanks to gps. Unlike yesterday, I am 'well prepared' today and a good weather is also helping me. It took me less than 30 minutes to reach my friend's house after Sg Besi tol. Ibu and I were visiting our long lost friend, 12 years to be exact, and thanks to facebook.

After spending almost 2 hours at her beautiful house, I went to Nilai 3. I only stop at 4 shops but ended up buying 3 items, which include a very large mirror, wooden mat and partition for the price of less than RM200 alltogether.

I really love the mirror, height about six or seven feet I guess. RM70 only! Can't I believe it! See.. it kinda made the so-called sofa looked smaller. I am a big fan of mirror, except the time when I look plump. Yeah.. fact is a bitter thing. And here.. the partition, also RM70. A simple one but ok loh!

I promised my friend to go to Nilai today.. so around 4 pm I left home. It is shown on gps the distance of my destination will be 40 km from house. I forgot to change the gps setting and unchecked the tollway avoidance so instead of using highway, I was 'instructed' to use an unfamiliar non-toll route. Due to highly trusting the gps, I saved money BUT i got lost! Darnggg!! Still, I kept driving and 'made' the gps choose tollway at last because there were no other non-toll route available at that time. I claimed it as victory against gps, BUT, again.. I got lost!

It was about 25 km from my destination when it happened. First, I showed my silliness to the toll gate girl by trying to pay the fare which is not required because they only distribute tolls tickets there!! Then.. instead of going right, I turned left and 'all the sudden' I was on my way back to KL again, + about 39 km from my destination! So, I just drove home + pay the unnecessary toll fare. End of story.

What a day!

I am watching TV news for the first time after almost 3 months! I am doing it while mob-blogging. Thanks to NO-interesting-watchable-program on tv at the moment. Chotto! I switched off my laptop to access internet from mobile phone? What was I thinking again.Yeah.. although my nokia 5800 phone is not as intelligent as i-phone, I am very much comfortable using it for 'interneting' compare to accessing from laptop.

I am the type who can live with NO-calls and NO-sms but not without NO-internet on the phone. Internet line is a MUST-HAVE to me. Not because of facebook, ym, email or social networking activities.. It just because of wikipedia and tons of usefull info that i can read + songs download of course ;) Though i have an account like facebook, just like anybody else but i am not really a big fan of social networking. I still remember, it was on my time the mirc whatsoeva online chat became popular but I only tried it once. I have ym but I only have a small group of very close friends on my list and..I rarely on line. And now with fb phenomena.. let see.. mmm.. most of the time the chat is off; often ignored friend request from 'strangers' (wanna use this word??really???!!); only less than 10 of 2++ fb friends of mine were new friends via friend request..while the others were schoolmates or someone that I personally knew. Yeah.. I think I sounded like 0.L.D.

Head ache every day and my eyes are killing me!

Nothing interesting happened today except for the part that I ate sate. I've been wanting to eat sate since last week. What else am I thinking about eh? chicken wings!!!! I could never be separated with chicken but still, shrimps and prawns are my 'true love'.

Kinda head ache at the moment. Is it because I have nothing to do or am I just being lazy today. I am thinking about KFC shrimps. Nyummmm... 

Yesterday.. my favorite stall reopened for business. Because they were busy holidaying, I ate cekodok for the previous four days!!! Can't imagine what will I be eating at the food court if the stall is no longer in operation. My favorite foods are fish tempura+mayonnaise with green vege. I never change my menu since ibu left almost a year ago. It is not that I am on a diet or anything.. it just I didn't have any appetite for other foods.

The good thing at that smelly food court besides my favorite foods was this beverage stall. The boys remembered my favorite drink so whenever I came,  they asked me, 'coffee sis?'. All I have to do is nod my head then my order will be 'kopi kaww kurang maness satu!'. Sometimes i could get my order faster than those ordering before me..sometimes of course la I dont.. hahaha. Adding to the fact, their coffee suited my taste and they understand when people said 'kurang manis', then it shall be less sugar unlike at mamak stall, no matter how many times you told them  'kurang manis' still ada manisss jugaaa!

"Love is thinking about others before you think about yourself...
Love is selfless not selfish...
Love is when you lay down your life for another...
Love is not rude, it is not self-seeking...
It is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.."

This is a part of a song lyrics actually and the melody is good + Bruno Mars is there.. except for the part where  the whole lyrics is kinda 'non universal'. I  happened to hear some of Bruno Mars songs on 4shared and ended up falling for his music, especially the 'Just The Way You  Are'

To those poor guys who are gonna be singing this song... 

I was thinking about her, thinking about me...
Thinking about us, what we gonna be?
Open my eyes, yeah; it was only just a dream...
So I travel back, down that road...
Who she come back? No one knows...
I realize, yeah, it was only just a dream...

I was at the top and I was like I’m at the basement...
Number one spot and now she found her a replacement...
I swear now I can't take it, knowing somebody's got my baby...
And now you ain't around, baby I can't think...
Shoulda put it down. Shoulda got that ring...
Cuz I can still feel it in the air...
See her pretty face run my fingers through her hair...
 


My lover, my life. My shorty, my wife...
She left me, I'm tied...
Cuz I knew that it just ain't right...

I was thinking about her, thinking about me...
Thinking about us, what we gonna be?
Open my eyes, yeah; it was only just a dream...
So I travel back, down that road...
Who she come back? No one knows...
I realize, yeah, it was only just a dream.

When I be ridin man I swear I see her face at every turn...
Tryin to get my usher over, I can let it burn....
And I just hope she notice she the only one I yearn for...
Oh I miss her when will I learn?

Didn't give her all my love, I guess now I got my payback...
Now I'm in the club thinkin all about my baby...
Hey, she was so easy to love. But wait, I guess that love wasn't enough...

I'm goin through it every time that I'm alone...
And now i'm missin, wishin she'd pick up the phone...
But she made a decision that she wanted to move one...
Cuz I was wrong.

And I was thinking about her, thinking about me...
Thinking about us, what we gonna be?
Open my eyes, yeah; it was only just a dream...
So I travel back, down that road...
Who she come back? No one knows...
I realize, yeah, it was only just a dream...

If you ever loved somebody put your hands up...
If you ever loved somebody put your hands up...
And now they're gone and you wish you could give them everything...
I said, if you ever loved somebody put your hands up...
If you ever loved somebody put your hands up...
And now they're gone and you wish you could give them everything..

I was thinking about her, thinking about me...
Thinking about us, what we gonna be?
Open my eyes, yeah; it was only just a dream...
So I travel back, down that road.
Who she come back? No one knows...
I realize, yeah, it was only just a dream...

And I was thinking about her, thinking about me...
Thinking about us, what we gonna be?
Open my eyes, yeah; it was only just a dream...
So I travel back, down that road.
Who she come back? No one knows...
I realize, yeah, it was only just a dream...

Nelly  - Just A Dream 

I want to write something today but I don't do any interesting activity to share, so, maybe I'll  just write about things that people didn't  know about me..

1. I play musical  instrument like keyboard, flute, recorder but I didn't know how to read music notes.
2. I loved to stay at home. I hate lizard because 'they' were noisy!
3. Every month, I spent money on books but never read them.
4. I collect dvds and will go madly crazy if  I lost even a single piece.
5. I hand-sew and really good at it.  I (used to) designed clothes and 100% hand sewed some of my dress, baju kurong etc
6. It was not my nature to speak face to face and say-it-out-loud if I were sad, mad or frustrated about something or someone,  I'd rather express it in writing.
7. I  hated waiting and loathed people who do not respect time.
8. I believe life is all about yes or no. I cannot deal with fickle minded person and those who do not know what they want in life.
9. I am very particular about kitchen and bathroom cleanliness if compare to any other spaces in my house.
10. Though I am not soft spoken & ladylike type, I hated rude people, especially rude women. Using rough and rude words is 100% unacceptable to me ears.

That's  too many information...

What  I do today.. i felt like  going to Bukit Tinggi but after reading the news that there will be around 1.2 mills of car heading back to KL this weekend, I decided home is the best place. My friend asked me to go somewhere..  when  I asked  him what is the best thing about the place.. nothing actually,  just  his family  house he said. I rarely visited my own family's house  and he is asking me to his.. naahh.. Such a good boy..

So, all I do today is sleep and watch tv.. lucky that I already did all my laundry earlier. One thing I really love about my house is the shop lot in front of it.  Bank, JPJ, hyper  market.. even the car wash shop is there. All i need to do is just  open the door, push the lift button down, walk to the gate.. cross the road.. tadaaa.. I am there already. The lrt is also there.. I only drive my car to go and back from work, never on weekend  because the lrt and annoying commuter is very near.

"is that what you really feel, or, is it what you think you  should feel?"...

This question made me think for a while.. Of course i am familiar with it because i happened to always caught in a situation where I am thinking about something else but my mouth saying something different. Maybe it was because our mind and heart is not always in sync, that it always left us caught in the middle...

There were boundary between what the heart wanted and what the mind is thinking. Wanting something or someone so badly but we can't do or have it because it is wrong or not right for us..  that often occurred in life. Like when you were madly mad at someone, you thought that person deserved punishment severely but you can't do that because it was not right. But I wonder what will happen if every time our mind will agree to what the heart is desiring and vice versa....

I started working today but my heart is not there yet. My mind is still thinking about R.E.S.T, adding to the fact that tomorrow is also an off day. Well.. I guess I am just lazy. Ok.. I admit I am lazy!

I am not ready to go to work yet.. How i wish everyday were holidays. Maybe i could find one super duper rich husband to support me as full time housewife.. If only logic part of my brain agree to that, wouldn't it be like 'heavennn' that i don't have to think about work anymore. But i am not a simple person..that is the problem!

Meeting friends and families during Raya, I was being asked the same question for a countless time about boyfriend and jodoh. Well.. As usual.. I prepared a standard answer for each and every questions asked. Kacauu eh!! To be frank, I sooo mmmuchh lo~ve to be friend with boys and prefer male friends rather than girls @ 98 to 2% ratio translated in math, but always.. i am not fond of the idea of making them special someone, except when the person were like magnet and I am unable to make myself not thinking about him all the time, which, rarely happened of course!

As a girl, I am the kind who is always making sure all questions were answerable. I won't easily agree to something that I doubt and I hated to lose to boys the most. I never gave any chance to boy to show off their 'smartness' on something i knew. I won't entertained their rubbish and sweet talk because my ear can't stand it and I think I am too smart to fall for it. See.. no wonder I am single..haha. Despite that, maybe one day I'll meet a guy who could lead me, someone who is smart enough to deal with me. I hate to lose but I don't like winning if I don't deserve it.. I just want to be right when it is right for me to be right, not just because I think i am right. I am a good follower, and I never wanted to be a leader. Well, it can be said the conclusion is.. I loved smart guy, not necessarily romantic, a great leader but certainly not bossy and selfish kay... So, if you are the one.. you've got to hurry ;p

I am at the airport at the moment. What a bore. I hated flying since forever and don't ask me why. Maybe because i loathed the idea of waiting.

It was a bit late but luckily i didn't miss my flight. My sis and i did experienced that few times, so every time i fly from sabah to kl..i will have to lie to my dad by adding 15 or 30 minutes to my departure time. And of course..i did it again today. Sorry dad..ahahah..

But... Now i am stuck here for an extra hour. Flight delay!! Waaaaaaaaa..

I am lying on my bed while writing this entry at the moment. Just want to kill minutes before i close my eyes.

...am soooo tired. As usual..we have photo shoot session today which we did every year. Lucky that i still have both granda pa and ma on my mother's side. Every year..there was never a day where one of my mom's siblings and their families wont be there during first day of Hari Raya. And now, with all the grand kids growing kakoi and kawai.. Today is one happy day and i am really in best mood =)

Barulah dapat membaringkan diri. Tadi da siap-siap masak rendang.. Masak half cook pastu besok baru masak lagi. Bukan sebab malas atau gas abis la.. Sengaja je nak perap..bagi masuk rasa dalam daging nan liat tu..sok barula masyuk nak melantak.

Pinggang aku yang tak ramping ni ada la juga terasa-rasa macam nak tercabut. Umah kitaorang nak kat besar..tak la juga tapi barang banyak gila. My dad jenis yang pantang bab dispose barang, so menimbun le kat umah ni. Nak kemas pun tak bule sembarang..kang kena fire dek my dad sebab alihkan barang-barang dia. Normally kitaorang adik beradik kemas bodo-bodo jek la..janji bersih. Pas ni bila umah kat bawah da siap..aku kompiden lah tak lama pas tu menimbun le barang juga. My mom pula ada hobi pelik..takat kalo kusyen kaler merah, langsir kaler oren & kapet kaler biru tu kitaorang adik-beradik memang no komen. Memang ketahuan la my mom ni fail bab color selection. Bila kena komplen..jawapan standard dia 'Biar lah..asalkan selesa'.. Well..nak kate apa lagi kan.

Elok la aku bawak tido mata yang tak ngantuk ni..karang jadi mata panda la esok. Selamat Hari Raya to all...

Hari ni malas sangat rasanya.. Rasa nak tido je. Malas nak fikir banyak walaupun ada rasa terkilan yang amat sangat dalam hati ni. Cuma mampu berdoa pada tuhan agar aku punya kekuatan untuk hadapi semua ni..tambah-tambah bulan puasa ni. Sekali sekala pulang ke kampung, tunjuk muka serabut depan family bukanlah satu perkara yang boleh dimaafkan.

Moga dengan izin tuhan, segala-galanya akan berakhir di sini..

Sampai-sampai dekat airport kk smalam, hujan lebat. Tunggu my dad pick me up.. more then one hour la juga..sampai mengantuk. Sepanjang jalan nak balik rumah rasa mual semacam jek.. Terpaksa la tekan perut oke.

I am at the airport. Bowwwinkk! My flight scheduled at 12.50 pm.. But here i am..since 8 am to be exact. I am flying air asia while my sister who is still a student opted for MAS. Children now days are unbelievable! Since she took morning flight..so i have to accompany her to erl and end up sleep-in-my-walking here. I slept at 1.30 last night just to fulfill my desire of playing my dusty keyboard. Blame it to my dad's casio that sound ahug-leyh =(

Fwens : (Puzzled) You are still single???
Me : Ya
Fwens : Ala.. Of course u have boyfriend rite?
Me : No
Fwens : Whyyyy? You r ok, cute, nice.. U have everything  whattt (whateveh).. But whyyy? (Emotional duh??)
Me : (smiling brightly ;D)

Friends.. I am not done trying, i am far from giving up.. It just i don't have desire to love and to be loved again. I am sorry to those who think i am definitely one interesting person.. Maybe i am but i could only bring warmth feeling to your heart and an endless smile to brighten your day.. That is all that i can do.

Remind me why I loved God, Save our King @ Kyo Kara Maoh!!! I used to be one of the fan-die-hard  of this anime during its aired on Animax few years back. The sound of its soundtrack kept ringing inside my head till the day I 'accidentally' bought a dvd box contained of 117 episodes.There goes my money....

But... with such an excellent graphic, handsome Conrad   & kakoiiii Yuri.. who cares if I spent RM50.. (darng! i care..)

Have you ever wished that you were no longer live in this world?

This might sound like I am suicidal.. but of course I am not. I am one of the most logical and rational  person, still.. It just, I did wished for that sometimes. I always prayed to God if breathing in this world bring no good for me and my peoples..I wished God could just take my life away, but if it were the other way around.. I prayed God will award me a strong heart to walk through a longer journey of life. 

It is no doubt that I am happy with my life, but deep inside my heart.. I could not hide the fact that I am extremely heartbroken. There were no right words to explain it. Love matter was just a small  portion of that "heartbroken".. there were lots of things and I dare not to think about it.

I laughed as much as I cried... This might sound like I am going crazy but everyone has their own way dealing with life and survive this world, rite.. I am just a normal person. I agreed when a counselor said that everyone in this world has mental problems. One could deny it out loud, and claim there were no defect on them.. truth is, it was not something for us to prove because it is not the matter of  right or wrong we are talking here.

Hari ni hari last induksi. Rasa lega amat sebab dah habis. Tadi dah pulun habis-habisan jawab soklan exam. Kol 10 sampai 12.30 exam esei. Dalam kol 12 tu aku dah siap la jawab soklan tapi saja tanak kuar dari  dewan. Fasi2 yang jaga tu dah balik-balik tanya aku, aku tanak hantar ker. Dengan degilnya aku kater tanak.. hahaha.. Dah la degil, pastu ingkar arahan plak. Orang suh jangan bercakap-cakap kalau paper tak dihantar lagi.. aku sebok borak dengan jiran sebla menyebla. Kedegilan  melampau aku telah menyebabkan fasi yang bakal cek paper kitaorang nanti amik kertas aku & baca kat situ gak.

Aku apa lagi.. op kos la saspen bila dia muka kerut-kerut sambil geleng-geleng pale. Gelak dia bila aku kater "encik jangan la tujuk muka gitu, nanti 3 bulan sy tak tidur lena". Mana tidak.. batch aku ni batch spesel.. dekat 600 orang skali intake. Kalau ekonomi tak yelok, mau kitaorang kena terminate kalau tak lulus dengan jayanya.

Smalam aku dapat sms wish good luck dari fasi-fasi penilai. Lagi la aku saspen nak exam ari ni. Last-last dekat pukul 10 aku dah tido gara-gara terteqan. Pagi tu dah gelabah sebab tak habis baca lagi. Tapi apa-apa pun.. kursus ni best. Lagi pulak budak-budak  group semua ok. Cuma ada la beberapa golongan dalam ramai-ramai 104 orang yang aku cukup tak berkenan, tau fikir pasal diri dia jek. Tak consider pun ramai lagi orang kat sekeliling tu. Tak paham aku.. nak kater budak.. da beranak pinak. Ni yang buat kurang pahala pose ni.. ahaha.

Kol 4 lebih aku dah sampai  umah.. basuh baju.. rilek2.. skali da kol 6.30 baru teringat yang aku belum beli lagi juadah berbuka tuk hari ni. Nasib tersedar...  kalau idak, mau aku berbuka minum air kosong jek.

Hari ni ada sesi persembahan daripada semua group.. kelakar ada nak marah pun ada sebab buat persembahan macam kanak-kanak ribena... hahaha

Study Time

Hari ni sambung lagi sesi study sebelum exam lagi 2 hari. Bedebau la juga nak exam.. kang fail exam kang malu oke! Ini le muka geng geng group aku.. ada 3 orang lagi ilang tah kemana, termasuk si botak aka paly.

Today is my worst nightmare.. I was appointed as the MC for evening session and.. also for the public speaking session. Darng! I never have a  single experience hosting an event my whole life nor did i love to talk in front of public.

Maybe what I should do now is to congratulate myself for being brave and overcome something I feared  duh!

Today we all learned  about communication skills. Darng! I was one of the person  listed in the first group to  present our speech at the evening. You know, I was known as bad at public. But I think I managed to have my courage during public speaking session. Of course I was nervous to death but thank god..all end well :)

We were given 5 minutes to prepare our speech. At this rate, everyone were equal. Maybe they were good at Bahasa speech but when it come to public speaking in English.. some might sound funny on stage, or even lost their words.

Today.. we played games and enjoy being in a group. There were 12 peoples in my group, 5 girls and 8 boys. I was the only unmarried girls while for the boys, there was only one guy who is married. Hahaha.. what a nice combination.

We were doing treasure hunt activities. Each group is required to finish a riddles at every station. The saddest part was during playing water in the pail. We made a little mistake that caused us 250 marks.

My course started at 8.30 am. Since I was so lazy to drive so i took the LRT. But, having to walk and climbing stairs here and there caused me to experience an extreme tiredness,especially during this fasting month.

Today, we were required to make a big circle and play some games before being divided into groups. Then, we were all given a piece of paper, which written there our clue for the group that we will be joining. It was funny when the clue started with the same animals doing a different things and the rules was, all of us were not allowed to talk at all. In order to find our group, we will have to communicate using sign language. If you use a different sign language or failed to understand what your friends 'said'.. then you will be left group less!

Lucky that my clue was easy to express and understand. Can you imagine, 104 peoples and 8 groups! How are you gonna find everyone when some of the clue were totally difficult to be translated into sign language.. for example like "the camel was being chased by robbers, broke its leg and being put to jail!"  hahaha.. I sure will remember this day forever.

I started my induction course today.. on Friday 13th. 104 peoples.. architects, engineers.. surveyors.. but just 3 or 4 familiar faces. The only girl friend that I recognized was IBU. She will be attending this two weeks course with me. Actually,  I was not scheduled to attend the course because my name was not listed. Maybe this is my luck. Although fasting month is the main challenge, but we were lucky that we could go home and doesn't require to sleep at unfamiliar places.

Our program started with introduction and games. I was voted as one of the worst 'player', twice.. for different games. Hahaha.. One because I was thinking way ahead, and one I was thinking way behind. Not liking the middle eh!

What I knew was, at the end of the day.. I was totally exhausted! We all were I guess.

Melampau betul orang yang jual produk kecantikan ni. Aku taw la pompuan memang suka emas tapi takyah la sampai make up pun ko claim ko bubuh campuran emas 24k. Takat eye shadow tu aku ble tahan lagi.. ini kek moisturizer, cream mato & serum bagai semuo ado 'serpihan' emas 24k kononnya. Apalah objektif yang cubo di capai, aku pun tak taw.

I am accidentally 'mastering' quite a number of sports and their rules like American football for watching EYESHIELD 21, basketball for SLAM DUNK, soccer for WHISTLE, tennis for PRINCE OF TENNIS.. baseball for CROSS GAME.. mmmm.. boxing and shogi are next..

But, what I want to say is that I never thought watching anime could made me rain a tears..darg! It was not that i got emotional (ok, may be a lil bittt) but.. the CROSS GAME anime kinda brought alive a mixed feelings and touch the right spot in this heart of mine. (sou desu ka?) I read at wikipedia saying that this anime is certainly something and I understand how good it is after watching 50 episodes countinuosly .

Just to say, although i was not a big fan of sport but i am a die-hard-fan of sport movies, dramas and anime.

I got excited and unable to stop myself from watching eyeshield 21 (Hiruma kun! yee haa i lap u), slam dunk, whistle and prince of tennis but the CROSS GAME is kinda different. It was about baseball.. well, no need to remind me about how crazy i was about ROOKIES drama back then coz i am currently back to watching it now.. ahaha.

I love EYESHIELD 21 because of Hiruma kun..

Sendoh San

Rokawa Kaede

Sendoh san and Rukawa for Slam dunk..and Tezuka for Prince of Tennis. Oh how i wish they were real..haha. For an almost 30 but still liking children stuffs.. I am sure a childish. But.. It was not my fault for they were so darg irresistable!

Tezuka San

What am I busy with lately?

A.N.I.M.E line up!

Slam dunk
GTO
Shion No Oh
Basquash
Master of Epic
Ring ni Kakero
Amatsuki
Eyeshield 21
Whistle
Yu Yu Hakusho
God Save Our King
Prince of Tennis
Detective School Q
Cross game
Top Secret

Ahaaaaa...

But the best is EYESHIELD 21!

I guess I am still trying, hard, to catch up with my old pace. Being betrayed to the core is sure an extremely bad thing for one to have to experience. It is my bad to see everything in this life in the form of YES or No but it is who i am. Because I always predicted how things are gonna turn out, so I ended up trying so hard to make a divert and opted for a way out. And since I hated so much to be caught in a situation that I could not handle, I am shielding my heart to the best.

But I failed, once.

It was not I was not ready for that. Frankly,  I already knew long before it happened but I never thought one person  I deeply trusted and looked up so highly could hold on to self-centering to the point where hurting people who deeply care about them means nothing at all. How was that hurt feeling like? The way I experienced it,  it was like someone stabbing me with a sharp  knife,  right trough the heart.. hold it there for a moment, pushing it down, slowly and patiently before tearing it apart.. I'd rather be shot than to have to experience that feeling again.

Why i hated wall clock? Yah yah yah I am always this weird. Truth is, I hated the sound of the motor. For being small, of course it was not not-quiet but it just not up to my acceptable not-annoying range because it disturb my good night sleep. Can you imagine that! And.. more.. I hated lizard because I cant stand the sound, and the sound of crazy drivers roaring their cars at night that entering my wide-open-for-fresh-air window.

Keep quiet and peace Y!

Åku meroyan ke apa hari ni.. Aku nek hangen ngan pokcik yang aku rasa tak lulus pun undang-undang jalan raya sebab motor buruk dia hampir2 dah nak dilanggar oleh aku. Siap menjerit pokcik tu sambil geleng2 paler.

Bukan salah aku pun dia temper tak pasal2.. dia ingat dia lori agaknya nak duk kat tengah2 jalan. Pastu ader plak keta nak himpit2 keta aku yang tak laju ni and cross2 da line.. walaopun ko lihat aku a driver dengan tudung aku yang kilat2 macam mak datin ni mister, haruss ko lihat skill membuli-jalan aku yang ekselen. High heel aku ni walopun 3" and aku mungkin kelihatan softly lady like itu time.. jangan ko kompius sebab aku bukan la like lady yang biasa ko jumpa bersepah di jalanan.. ahahaha.

I am freeing my mind from work matters this week. so here i am..attending a 4 days course on airconditioning design.

So, was my mind free? Not at all!

I was so excited to learn and it cause me to study at home. Please anyone tell me what was I thinking!

I can't stand to be mad at anyone and it is known to be my nature. I am always full of positive auras but i recently experienced the I-HATE-U feeling. I hated someone. Wait! You know what.. actually, i loathed that person. I am glad i said this.

I used to work at an island and now, at shopping complex.. Where doest that get me? Yah.. HOME SWEET HOME.

I am so lazy to spend my weekend anywhere.. And two days were never enough for a weekend..how i wish everyday is weekend.

Orang awam 1      : bla..bla..bla... Drive keta apa?
Engineer J             : Tak drive.
Orang awam 1      : Driver ambil la ye?

Engineer J             : Tak.
Orang awam 1      : Dah tu?
Engineer J             : Naik komuter.
Orang awam 1      : Oh. Tapi keta tinggal kat stesen komuter la ea?

Engineer J             : Tak.
Orang awam 1      : Dah tu?
Engineer J             : Motor.
Orang awam 1      : Oooooooooooooooooooooo

I am fat again!

Well.. this has always been a problem with me. I was never able to bear sadness or to involving myself in a miserable phase that could make me lost interest in food. Losing one or two kg always means doubling up the amount of kgs after that. Why is this happening to me? Why cant I be in a sad-state for such a long period till it make my appetite disappear? Why!!! Why like tis...

I am soooo wanna buy the 42" tv..

Tapi bila memikirkan  tv lama ni nak letak mana.. kuncup skejap semangat membuak nak  beli tv baru. Nak jual sayang.. pakai pon baru setaon lebey jek.. balance warranty ader lagi dekat 4 taon. Time beli dulu reganya 2 raban lebey, tu pon da kira murah.. skarang bawah seraban to seraban lebey da boleh dapat 32". Tapi temptation  tv 42" tu sangat la kuat.. macamana ni?!!!!!

Masuk ari ni , aku da survey banyak kali dah. Aku ni spesis yang whatever jer yang pernah terlintas dalam kepala.. lambat atau cepat, biasanya aku akan dapatkan jua. Tu yang aku takut tu! Tapi tv lama nak letak mana?  nak buat monitor or tv game macam melampau. Nak jual, aku memang tanak sebab rugi. Lagi pon it's just tv.. macamana rapid skalipon kemajuan teknologi, function tv tu tatap tak berubah like bertambah function as toaster ker, rice cooker ker..  kannnn.

Masalahnya...  aku nak beli jugak!!

Tv skarang LCD, aku ingat nak beli plasma. Story pasal plasma.. aku ingat welding jek guna plasma as gas. Plasma tv ni gambor memang chantek tapi antara kekurengan dia, karan consumption tinggi sket berbanding LCD, dalam 25%. Tapi aku nengok Samsung kater tv dia enery saving.

Aku teringat time nak beli tv dulu.. tukang jual slalu gembar gembur pasal contrast. Sebenarnya kalo nak beli tv, 1st yang kena pk.. tv tu nak letak dekat mana.  Kalo dalam bilik jek.. tak  kan nak pasang tv dengan backlight terang seterang2nya. Well, kalo tak sayang mata, boleh je pun.

Kesimpulannya.. aku tak  kira.. nak tv! nak tv!

I sure know how to disobey a boss! Well.. I like it here. Being the only girl and be filled with 'love'.. darng! hahaha.. but I miss my old days,  my old boss, my old house, my old friends.. and my old LA! I looked at the picture of them.. and I missed them even more!

As I  was relaxing at my cubicle, saw someone that I adore entered the office ; my idol. As I was walking out of my relaxing zone, my idol was just about to come to my place. Speaking of nervousness, I pretended I was doing something. Cheh! And the stories goes on...

Well.. I don't really enjoy today. Someone scared me and I don't like to be left alone with that person.

I watched The Karate Kids  and loove it! The story was a bit slow but it was kinda forgivable because of Jaden Smith. God, the boy is so cute. He surely will become one handsome playboy one day.

Why I became mechanical engineer?

Here is the one fact that I myself is so darg clear of.. I HATED MATHEMATICS and don't ask me why. I was History's subject lover and I excelled at that, but what involving calculations I loathed.

It all started when I was 15. I qualified to be in a science stream class. So, I have a talk with my dad where I voice out my opinion of taking a non-science class. My dad, as usual will let me make the decision, BUT.. as smart as he always is.. he said.. "I have no objection towards whatever you likes,  and you know the decision is all yours, but bear in mind, science's stream definitely offer big market for jobs" With that... I ended up choosing science's stream ya'll. But truth is.. I never knew what I wanted to be since I was a naive-little girl but I knew best where I wanted to be.

I went to boarding school at peninsular because I wanted to meet my favorite boy band, 4U2C back then and I applied engineering because I wanted to study at UTM, well.. I entered ITTHO but ITTHO and UTM is related back then.  So, the kesimpulan is, I became a mechanical engineer because of the place!

How do I describe a perfect life?

Well.. in my humble mumble mind..

1st.. be one successful career woman; a technical-guru, sporting & sempoi boss!  Well.. speaking of current, i'm kinda on the right track because I loved what I am doing now. So, everything that start from a good beginning is a bless, rite?..

2ndly, Family..  2 be married to someone smart and always making sure he is on top of his game like Dr Mahathir; which look as handsome as Grey's Anatomy Eric Dane..  being a mother to one complete-soccer-team of sons who look like the twin, Cole and Dylan Sprouse.. also Nick &  Joe Jonas.. Then completed with two daughters who look exactly like Miley Cyrus and Selena Gomez.. that is the definition of PERFECT! Ok, at the moment I kinda miss the boat coz I have not find someone I wanted yet. Heart  matters is not something simple. I was asked few times why don't I just attach myself to someone. To choose a guy is like buying a property to me, like a land or house.. i don't want to waste my time on something I end up regretting having it or to have to stay with someone  I dont really wanted to be with. I'd rather be alone then making myself doing that. I am girl full of love and i am committed to it. But, never mind.. things will work out itself.. I  believe that.

3rd, to own tons of long sexy dress! a TONS!
i am a fan of it, and jackets too.

Well.. i think that just it. I am not all about big house or being rich or powerful what ever... I am just a girl with a simple wish, desiring to enjoy a simple life with lots of sons and two daughters. I loved boys, I am gonna be making lots of them.. twins preferably..hahaha. I loved Miley Cyrus.. she is one beautiful daughter and Selene Gomez is sooo cute!  Wait.. maybe it is not one simple life, is it? Yeah..blame it to Disney Channel.But.. way to go girl!

Guess my dreams isn't simple :)

Men were the architect  of their own fate..  I agreed.. as Muslim,  I believed everything happened if it were granted by god. We could plan, we could do whatever we want but if god did not permit it, then that just it. Everything happened for a reason but we need to remember, God will never change our fate unless we do it first. I am  changing mine of course :)

Why am i being ustazah today? douh!

Shakira - wherever whenever Cover

It was funny when Af1 asked me.. Which country did this singer came from coz she didn't sound English.. Hahaha..

I'm walking away

I'm walking away from the troubles in my life
I'm walking away oh to find a better day
I'm walking away from the troubles in my life
I'm walking away oh to find a better day
I'm walking away

sometimes some people get me wrong
when it's something I've said or done
sometimes you feel there is no fun
that's why you turn and run
but now I truly realize
some people don't wanna compromise
well I saw them with my own eyes spreading those lies
and well I don't wanna live a lie, too many sleepless nights
not mentioning the fights, I'm sorry to say....

A long and tiring day indeed. da dekat kol 11 mlm, still mengadap kerja. Today is "My home my office" day.  Dah la ari ni ari malas nak layan orang. Ader konsaltan seruper takder. Sengal! Nak marah  pun, buang tenaga aku jek. Aku dahla memang x mampu nak marah orang.. kang aku termarah kang..haa.. Elok le aku p mandi manda jap.

Sambung balek.. Segar le sikit pas dah mandi ni. Sok ramai yg takde.. Skarang aku dah ada nama baru, kalo dulu RSenora panggil aku matahari..skarang ade plak yg panggil aku Yang kat opis tu. Nasib le aku ni jenis yang memang malas nak ambik kesah. Sukati la, as long korang bahagia.. Jangan over, sudah. Aku ni pemarah orangnya, tapi aku tak reti nak marah. Kalo aku cakap aku marah kat orang, maknanya aku marah2 ayam jek tapi kalo aku tak bercakap langsung pasal orang tu or avoid any conversation yang melibatkan that person, means aku memang dah letak orang2 tu dalam recycle bin memori aku. Ikut ati nk delete terus, tapi benda 2 di luar kawalan aku plak.

Tapi smpai today aku still berterima kasih dalam diam2 pada someone yang ajar aku how to be someone yang pemarah tapi tak payah le nak buang karan marah orang. Aku juga berterima kasih dalam diam pada someone yang pemarah tahap gaban yang telah mengajar aku bahawa muka orang yang sedang marah amat huduh & kalah buldog sampai aku taknak contohi. Juga a big thank you to someone yang grumpy, yang mengajar aku grumpy woman is worse than nenek kebayan. Moga aku tak kelihatan seperti bulldog @ nenek kebayan.. Ahahah.

 "Pa.. aku try call bapa tapi nda dapat pula. Saja mau ucap Selamat Hari Bapa. Sayang bapa"

Tell  your parents that you love them while you still can. Well.. walopun setahun lagi nak masuk 30, a daughter remain as a little children inside their parents heart.

 So, I reached Rompin..finally, for the first time.. What a day. So sleepy at the moment.. Goodnight world!

Happy Father's Day to all fathers in the world..
Epecially to my one and only beloved father.....

A daughter could get another boyfriends.. another husbands.. another sons.. but always only one DAD. For everything that you and mom sacrificed for us, Thank-You is beyond word

Well.. straight to today's story.. As I was about to leave for during lunch, someone asked me why i went down alone and where are my groups. The question came with statement that my unit members ,THE MECHANICAL which is from the boss to the last one on the hierarchy were always seen together2. This is the second time i heard this statement this week.. I heard people mention about that few times before but this is the first time, twice in a week.

Well.. In my unit, i can tell you that there were no one is playing bosses, groupie or what so ever. Of course there was a bad seed but, it was not bad gila pun, maybe just a defect..hahaha. Besides eating and joking, we normally discuss about work at the table. We update each other and share whatever we encountered on our daily job. Breakfast or lunch was the best time to do all that coz when we were at the office.. We will not have enough time to bother about each other. I remembered Aboss once suggested us to have a coffee corner.. Besides having some time to spent together talking about work and life, the idea was best to prevent us from going out for breakfast..ahahah. Clever!

... as far as i could remember, we have been doing the together2 from my first day at the office... We talked, we laughed, we kutuk people but never kutuk  the gang (kutuk depan2 sudaa), that definitely is a rules to maintained ;p

I was asked by someone today, was he annoying?
He asked me, kalau orang perempuan ni if laki di khawin 2 dia dapat apa ye?

I am as clever as you la brader and easily understand what are u trying to imply

Rightnow, since i am so sleepy..
I better zzzzz...and just forget
EVERYTHING

Do I want to go back to LA again?
I don't know...

I mean.. I love the place..

Today.. my deary AF1 said I don't have to go to Gua Musang with adik. Happy me. R Senora came from LA to receive his excellent service award here.  The six of us celebrated it at kotak merah during lunch. As usual, I was forced to sing his favorite song.. hahaha. And RMD is there too. We went to PJ on the evening.. last I know I was only home at 10 pm. Well, thanks to a lousy traffic jam that spare us times to catch up on our stories.

And I miss home.. I miss mum.. and dad.. and home..

Chop! Did i just made someone had a crush on me till he behave oddly towards me? OH NO.. No V.0 on the guy-matter at the moment! I already have one left for me to deal-out.

Enough about that.. Well.. The first thing i did after i reached home this evening was cooking. Yes, COOKING and yes, the i-cooked statement is kinda overrated, i know.

So.. I fried minced chicken, add some herbs, pour a tomato-garlic-selasih sauce and cheese.. Wallah..there goes my bolognese sauce...i boiled water, add in salt and pasta, then i go to take a bath. I always hate this pasta boiling part because it took much longer then preparing the sauce.. why can't pasta be as simple as preparing mee.

I ate and ate and ate.. Ow..heaven! Best bolognese speghetti awarded to Little Italy at KK, 2nd is mine and 3rd is pizza hut. I am sorry, I can't hide the fact here ;p I did try Dominos, Italianese, The Spaghetti Farm, Delifrance, Chillies and some but still, Pizza Hut is the 3rd best.. 2nd of course it  is mine.. Hahahaha x100 megazillions.

So, tomorrow i will be at putrajaya.. The next day maybe at gua musang and how i wish the day after i were in my bed. Nothing is more relaxing other than spending my time in my own room watching movies, cartoon & series or playing a video game or strumming guitar or playing a keyboard..or reading a books while enjoying a cup of hot coffea and, forcing the TV to watch me instead of me watching it. Poor tv!

How to say NO to people without hurting them? I learn it the hardest way, which is from own experience that there was no way to do that without hurting them or getting yourself hurt.

Just recently, i turned down a proposal.. then someone turned me down. Well, who said life is NOT fair? Then.. I am about to do that again to someone, soon or, am i? Yeah, why do i kept shutting-off my heart? Should i just wait till my heart recover or give it a chance? Everything happened for a reason, rite? So..is this the reason?

Demam dah kebah tapi badan still lemah. Makanan still la rasa pahit. Minggu ni terasa berakhir dengan pantas sebab aku keje 1.5 days je. Sedih + demam or sedih sampai demam..yang mana satu aku pun x sure.. Huhu.

Aku cuti lagi hari ni. Walaupun aku hampir nak demam..tp hati aku dah beransur-ansur pulih. Walaupun ada saatnya dada tiba-tiba terasa sesak. Bayangkanlah time tidur, tiba2 boleh terjaga sebab dada rasa sesak & air mata dah bercucuran. It happened during sleep! Kalau skala sedih tu 10, 10 it is for my sadness.

Saat2 macam ni..masih ada rupanya rakan yang ambil berat, yang tiap hari sms tanya aku ok ke tidak walaupun hujung pangkal kesedihan aku ni tak diketahui. Masih ada yang rajin menghibur aku dengan panggilan telefon. Though sadness remain, maybe in 2 or 3 years, or maybe forever.. But i believe that i'm gonna heal and be ok. Walaupun sedih sampai rasa macam nak mati, i owed my sorrow a big time for bringing back something that almost forgotten in this few years. I really hope this feeling inside will last forever, exception for my sadness of course.

One week, i lost 2 or 3 kgs. I still unable to eat properly till now. For a girl who never stop smiling and showing her happy face, the one who seem to not get along well with problems or stresses, guess her saddness and sorrow was unimaginable this time..even for herself.

At the moment ni tgh bersidai kat kedai mamak kat midvali ni. Ari keje midvali..ujung minggu midvali..haru! Lg sejam stengah baru wayang stat..alamat tetido la aku dalam tu karang.

Masalah makan aku da belanjutan ampir seminggu. Abis la. Takat kurus xpe.. Kering jangan. Kang jadik cam osmate lama aku..kurus sebab makan ati. Aku ati memang tak makan..pedal..limpa..smua aku x makan..ahahah.

Lenguh jugak kaki aku meneman adik ni shopping barang umah kat cafo. Kalo terserempak ngan member yang kenal kitaorg ni, silap2 ingat kitaorg asben wef yang tengah beli barang dapur..ahahah. Apa taknya..setroli penuh member tu borong. Aku plak pasrah je membontot dia. Apakah lelaki zaman skarang ni lebih terer soping dari pompuan? Hahaha.

Yeaaa.. audit da berakhir. Next week audit kat melaka plak kot. Kol 5 dari shah alam.. dkt kol 7 baru sampai opis. Aku da setengah mabuk dah tadi.. rakan ZA ngan driver tu da cuak. Siap suh bukak tingkap & bagi aku plastik takut2 aku muntah. Ahahah.. Sampai umah, da maghrib da. Asar qada' jek.. nak wat camaner. Jalan jem teruk ari ni. Da la aku buat lawak.. orang isi form lain, aku plak isi form lain. Melu i! Rakan ZA lagi teruk, baru ari ni dia realize apa yang dia buat.. after 5 ari dik oi! punya la lambat dia stat engin

Program tengok wayang aku banyak rupanya.. adik ajak tengok wayang malam ni, rakan ZA ajak tengok ari ahad.. & konsultan aku pun ajak g tengok wayang sabtu. Tp aku rasa..last2 aku tgk wayang kat bilik jek ni nanti. Aku kena la restkan otak aku yg da letih ni.

How should you feel when someone you looked up at, so highly turned to be nothing more than a nobody? The one man who always talked about how no-good and how uncivilized other peoples are while the truth is, he was no better than them? The one who seemed so wise, but he was not at all? Why say much, he was just a nobody!

Well.. skarang ni aku dah tak payah curik koneksi wifi kedai mamak kat bawah 2. Aku da tukau prepaid aku g post paid+data @ 68 hengget je sebulan. At the moment, aku stuck ngan report ni. Tadi bos ajak turun shah alam.. nak lari dari miting la tuh.. Ahaha. Banyak benor audit. Audit dalaman, audit perolehan,audit pembinaan, audit sirim.. audit projek kawan.. kawan audit projek kawan dan bermacam2 lah lagi jenis audit yang merapu meraban. Next week aku kena audit projek kawan. Time kawan tu audit projek aku, time tu la padan muka aku.

Bos aku tu orang yang paling tak rajin la nak ronda2 site. Imagine la.. baru pegi 3 or 4 tempat jek.. bersusun report non-compliance boleh kuar. Orang experience, macam tu la. Kalo yang muda2 ni, round 40 kali pon still tak nampak2 gak apa yang silap. Dahla aku buat gempak kat kontraktor. Tapi sebab aku buat gempak tu la aku dapat tangkap teet.. eheh..

Dalam keta borak2 la ngan bos& rakan ZA. Bos aku kutuk rakan ZA, nama jer budak mekanikal.. tapi minyak itam keta tu pun tak reti tukar..ahahaha.. Bos aku kalo ngutuk.. kaw2! Tapi bukan nak cakap la.. lelaki skarang ni da banyak yang lembik & da tak reliable. Kalo bapak aku.. cakap je.. hal2 repair keta, benda2 mekanikal & letrik.. bertukang.. menjahit.. memasak.. berkebun.. sumer dia terer. Yang aku tak pasti cuma bab toreh getah sebab aku tak pernah nampak dia join mak aku mengisi masa lapang menoreh pohon2 getah dia. Still, bapak is the best! Walopun dia garang, lagi tak romantik.. he is the best guy ever. Boyfren.. asben.. wife.. gepren.. sumer bule di tukar, tapi your parents ader satu tu je. Sobs.. homesick la nih!

Aku sangat berterimakasih pada Allah sebab masih sayangkan aku. Teringat kater2 bos aku tadi, tuhan tak akan duga seseorang yang sememangnya Dia tahu tak mampu nak hadapi dugaan yang diberikanNya. Means, setiap dugaan tu hanya diturunkan pada orang2 yang sememangnya mampu la nak hadapi dugaan tu walau macamana payah pun... walo pun orang tu rasa dia tak mampu tapi sebenarnya orang2 tu lebih kuat dari apa yang mereka sendiri sangkakan. Mungkinkah aku ni tergolong dalam golongan yang kurang mampu menghadapi dugaan?

Diam bukanlah bererti aku mengiyakan apa yang kamu buat. Diam tidak pernah bererti aku suka. Tidakkah kamu terfikir aku hanya cuba mengelakkan konflik? Sedarkah kamu bahawa aku berdiam untuk menjaga air muka dan hati kamu? Pernahkah kamu terfikir yang kamu agak keterlaluan dan perilaku kamu sebenarnya menjengkelkan?

Apakah kamu mahu menguji tahap kesabarana aku? Kerana aku rasional dan berfikir panjang, aku tidak pernah kehilangan sabar walaupun aku sebenarnya kurang sabar. Aku juga mampu jadi seperti kamu, tapi aku tidak memilih untuk berperilaku seperti kamu kerana aku tahu berfikir. Dan aku kasihankan kamu kerana kamu cuma nampak diri kamu.

I am at mamak restaurant at the moment and a lil pissed off. I have to go to merlimau this morning so i woke up as early as 5.45 just to ensure i wouldn't be late for my 7.20 expected pick up time. I waited from 7.20 to 8.20 to 9.20 till now and the car is no where to be seen. God know how i hated waiting!

Af1 smsed.. The driver had a late-wake-up this morning. Maybe he was more pissed off than i am. Aboss is also coming with us. Speaking of him, Aboss was not very fond of the 'taking care of any of the company's car' part because he had a bad experience previously. Well..it kinda made our unit 'car-less' and we will have to everytime to politely ask other units 'is your car still empty?' question. So, back to my story.. I believe Aboss wouldn't be impressed with the 'oh-i-woke-up-late-this-morning'.

Man fighting god in clash of the titan? Man trying to save his family from world wreckage as in 2012 whatsoeva movie? I dont care if you call it box office, creativity or what eveh.. I only see it as stu u pi id ity. What about this? Naah.. Irrelevant!

This week is gonna turn to next week quickly. I am off to melaka tomorrow, attending a 2 days course the next day.. Then come fri-hol-i-day.. Yeahuuu. I didnt realize there is gonna be a holiday this friday until today.

I blog via my mob-phone while watching csi at the moment. The csi new york is getting 'hotter' but am i getting 'dumber' or what? Maybe i am just testing my spelling skill or my sms typing skill or challenging my brain logic for why-didnt-i-just-switch-on-my-laptop? Daa..

Among those series aired on tv , Glee was listed THE UGLIEST SERIES AIRED ON MY TV! Listening to Rachel (i guess this was the main girl character's name ) is a pain in the ass. I am sorry to have to say this but I really can't stand it. It was like listening to Vanessa Hudgens whatsoever in High School Musical. Maybe Miley Cyrus was not the most talented girl but at least she didn't mess with my ear and she is pretty too.

I hate Sex in The Cities too!

26 Kb/sec was the highest download speed I can get from digi data, but of course it happened rarely. Despite that, it was still way better than my office Internet connection. When everything you clicked was being restricted by stupid  i-prism, then only you learn to appreciate the not-so-fast-connection-but-i-can-still-download-anything-i-like-by-being-patience.

Something happened at my office. All our supporting staffs, except two were being transferred to po-li-ce. Come on, from health care to 'policing'?  I don't get it. As far as i remembered, we were asking for additional staffs to cover our unit but were given the 'staff reducing' instead? Where can you get an engineer, the so called professional do the filing job, take care of stationaries or make report on punch and what-so-evah-stuff? It happened at govern-office people! With lots of meetings and meetings and meetings to attend, the stuff came out during meeting that needed to be taken care of, contractual part that require attention, drawings checking, contractor's submission that require fast action, monthly site evaluation that needed to be done, work quality monitoring and the claim that needed to be recommended for payment, who have time to care if all the letters or memos were being nicely recorded in a file as per ISO requirement or stationeries supply down or to report someone was having his card punched red this month whatsoever. Don't get me started with the numbers of project, location, lacked of staff and budget restriction.

Above all.. maybe I hated the way everything goes in government but I loathed those stupid peoples who didn't know how to be thankful  to live in such a peaceful country.

Why Dont Women Have Beards?

I happened to read about this from one of my books. Why? What crossed over my mind to made me ever think about talking 'bout beards?! But imagine a girl with beards.. wouldn't it be so iyuck?

Talking about man consideration, during lunch today... one of my koncho asked me :: awak tak takut ker tak kawen2 lagi ?:: He even said, kalau khawin dapat banyak pahala tau. It didn't took me long to answer. As easy it could be to own pahalas, it would be way more easier to own dosas.

Who doesn't want to have family?  But, spare me for rejecting the idea of marrying someone for a wrong reasons  such - afraid of what people might think - afraid of becoming a source of threat to community esp for married women - afraid of being alone, esp the dying alone part  - afraid of loneliness - afraid of so many things which is not possible for my brain to reach those ridiculous kind of thinking.

Same answer I always gave to myself when came to rejecting a guy :: He is Not up To my Standard  :: But what is my standard actually? What is the bench marked i set for myself? The whole STANDARD idea is crap because the truth was, I never really liked them. I didn't felt the connection because the chemistry was not right. As easy it is for me to fall-in-like with a guy, it is way more easier to UN-LIKE them.

I went to proton service center to check on my power window. Darng I miss-interpreted the GPS so instead of turning left, I turned right which causing me to waste 15 minutes on the road just to find my way back to the right place. If it wasn't for the turn-right-is-not-right,  the service center was just less then a km away.

Despite that, I managed to reach the service center at 9.35 am which is 5 minutes late from my appointment. I waited there for 3 HOURS people! How I wish I were in LA at that moment. God knew how I hated waiting so much. I can deal with almost everything but do not ever try to play waiting with me because I am never a patience when come to that.

 TOP HATE LIST AT THE MOMENT
1. Waiting
2. Grumpy young lady. You are YOUNG ladiezzz!
3. Pushy people
4. Smelly guy.. yuck! Deodorant cost lest then RM10!
5. Cupid wannabe.. we were born HUMAN people!


TOP HOT LIST
1. Bully budak!
2. Video Game
3. Crying... miss dad.
4. Watery gamez
5. Nasik kerang mokcik lori

Tengah aku bersenang lenang dalam bilek malam tu.. osmate aku ketuk tanyer napa washing machine dia tak maw kuar air...Since aku yang last guna smalam.. wah!

Dia cam tensi la.. machine tu baru lagi,mahal pulak kater dia. Slama ni tak pernah macam ni.. dia tak pernah langsung tekan2 tuk ubah apa2 setting kat board tu, ikut jek apa yang installer tu set masa mula2 pasang. Dia kater kalu tekan2, nanti setting dia berubah. Bunyiknya berbaur cam nak marah aku la sebab aku memandai tekan2..

Aku?

1st.. washing machine tu memang membolehkan manual setting.. which is boleh la pilih mana2 function yang kita suke which aku cuma suka function spin. Setahu aku kat umah aku, bule jek tekan tekan tekan tuk pilih function & takder plak la membolehkan kerosakan berlaku.

Tapi aku senyap je la sebab machine tu dia punya. Aku tak tahu la pulak pilih function spinning tu akan menyebabkan rinsing function tak fungsi. So dijadikan cerita, aku pon monitor la machine tu dalam sejam sampai lengoh kaki aku berdirik.. cycle machine tu jalan cam biasa je. Wash-->rinse-->Spin.. tapi time rinse air dia tak kuar banyak so tu la yang menyebabkan alarm buzzer menjerit error. Air dalam machine tu tak dapat drain abis, kena bukak & tutup cover machine tuk manually restart proses rinse dalam 2 kali sepaya next cycle ble start.

Kesimpulan story aku ni, aku tak taw kaitan antara button-tu-disediakan-untuk-ditekan-&pilih-function-tapi-kalo-ditekan-tuk-pilih-function-secara-manual-akan rosak? daaa!

My my.. 29th oredi

I am TODAY "29-singlebutunavailable-cuteofcourse-darghappydefinitely!" Ahahaha..

Pas bekfast.. aku ngan my sis da tataw nak wat apa. My sis kata bopren dia ader kat cc kat area kitaorang makan. Setahu aku, budak tu dok dekat Jalan Pahang yang aku baru jek tahu kat situ la ada projek aku + kat situ ader monorail rupoanya + hotel grand aper ntah pon kat citu rupanya. Oke.. berbalik pd story aku. Jauh la jugak dari sini.. elleh! orang berchenta.. jalan jem sangggup kome redah yer! So.. aku pon suh la adik aku pegi tengok2 boypren dia & aku balik umah.

Then my sis sms.. tanya aku nak tak ikut dorang g karaoke. Opkos la nakkk!! Ahahaha.. 3 jam bertapa kat KotakMerah. Before tu dapat sms dari makcik aku, kononz nak datang bawak member asben dia yang dorang nak kenalkan dekat aku.

Minggu ni minggu makan sushi... serasa aku.. 2 or 3 kali jugaklah muka aku muncul dekat sushi king minggu ni. Makan apa lagi.. of course la kawa piri piri.. kulit ikan pevret aku..  sedappppppnyeeeehhhh.

Minggu ni berakhir dengan sekejap sebab aku kena pegi kursus 2 hari.. pastu the next day jadik eskot pm kat tapak sebab pok menteri nok melawat tapak projek. Bukan eskot pun.. istilah yang paling seswai ialah mak pacak. Ntah haper2 ntah. Gara2 tensih jadik mak pacak, aku x berjodoh nak berjumpa dengan best pren lama tem aku kanak2 ribena dulu.

Kelakar.. bebudak ni duk ingat aku ngan adik ader apa2. Bukan takat sorang dua.. ahaha... tak selera mak! Setahun beza pun aku da raser cam 10 taon, aper lagi yang beza bertaon2.

Tapi dak adik ni memang la cam dak pompuan. Kalo adik aku sorang tu, biar pun kalo kuar ngan dia, dia macam takder perasaan jek jadik tukang bawak beg tangan aku.. tapi tak la sejambu adik aku sorang ni. Yela.. dia pon baru jek masuk.. orang pon dia tak kenal lagi. Hahaha.. mokcik jugak yang tak der perasaan kena kater.. siap pheeewitt diri sendirik.

Ari ni aku g bertapa kat kotak merah. Berat aku da mencecah 66.7 kg. Gemuk! Gemuk! Gemuk!!! AF2 tegur aku.. kater diet tapi napa aku nampak macam bertambah gemuks. Ah! tensihnya. Aku jawab la.. bukan salah aku.. salah baju le. Hahaha.

Baru ari ni aku taw yang stereng keta aku tu bule retain balik shape dia. Kelam kabut aku letak cover sebab stereng lock yang aku pasang tu agak ketat sampai luka luki stereng tu dibuatnya. Skali tadi.. elok je pun. Tak der langsung kesan stereng lock tu. Waah! Aku ketinggalan jaman ke aper ke.

Since dak adik takot peristiwa tak berdarah semalam berulang..  awal2 lagi dia sound, ari ni naik keta dia. Hahahaha. Memang betul la orang cakap "woman like peoples, men like things". Dak adik ni.. keta dia ni pun ada nama oke. Da la biru.. ini kaler pon de dan ni dik oii..

Who dare question my driving skill haaa???

Hahaha... peristiwa ngeri + kelakar happen hari ni.

Kol 3 pagi aku dapat sms dak adik tuk confirm kursus ari ni. Katernya kol 7.30 dia akan sampai umah aku. Pechaya sangat laa aku akan kater2 dusta dak ini. As expected, kol 8 lebey baru dia sampai umah pagi tadi. Pegi ngan keta aku, op kos la aku yang drive kann..

Nak dijadikan cerita.. kursus sangat bosan. Pagi tadi pun terkial2 nak cari otel kat putra jaya tu. Dekat2 kol 5 la jugak kursus abes. Dalam perjalanan balik, ujan renyai2 kat luar. Tengah aku nak wat corner kat jalan tu.. tetiba ader keta ni over-corner! Oitt! ko amik lesen terbang ker?!!! So, aku pun tekan brek.. apa lagi.. keta aku pon swing la ke kiri & kanan banyak kali... skettt lagi nak terbabas. Keta belakang da ler dekat. Tetiba aku dengar suara panik menjerit

Lepas brek!

Lepas brek!

Lepas brek!

Patut aku panik sebab kereta dah out control tapi aku cam blur dengar jeritan panik dak adik.  Hahaha.. Da cool down sumer.. dak adik pon ngaku akan betapa pada hari ini jatoh macho dia as mat rempit selama ini. Dia kater, slama dia merempit kat jalanz..xpernah ler dia setakut ari ni. Apakah driving skill aku amat terukz?

Kelakar giler time dia jerit tu. Tapi dak adik ni jerit pun ala2 garang tak garang.. ahahaha. Nasib jugak ler aku tak gabra & x lepas stereng.. kalo x, confirm la kitaorang langgar divider. Mujur jugak le keta blakang x langgar aku & hentam my car to divider.. arwah jugak aku ari ni kalo idak. Giler lah! Spanjang jalan sampai ler ke umah aku gelakkan dak adik gara2 dia menjerit aww tadi. Patut aku yang cuak, tapi dia yang lebey.. dak adik! dak adik!

This is a very good book that came with a very not-good-price. There was this brain wiring quiz in this book to determine what type of brain we have. It said that 

Fifteen to 20 percent of men have feminine brains.
About 10 percent of women have masulinized brains.

And.. my score showed that I have a man brain. Dangg!! No wonder I am so handsome.. hahaha. I kinda agree because I am the type of person who like to choose something in between. For example if i were to choose a clothes, I would go for something that look smart but still has a feminine touch. I dont go pinky & flowery all over me like walking carpet (Yahhh..  I recently bought a pink twinkle2 little star baju kurong. Does that count? ahahah) nor did I chose something that made me look like a man.. yuck! I am soooo not lady like but of course I am like a lady. What? You don't spot the different? ahah.

Maybe I am 70% woman and 30% man I guess. Well.. to be proud and annoying ;p I excel at women tasks like cooking (not baking!), sewing, being sweet and annoying at the same time etc. I cried when I saw a sad movie and smiled every time I saw a baby. I can concentrate on doing 3 or 4 things at the same time like most women do but I my brain don't function the way most women do.. there goes my 20%.

 Enough about my proud-talking.. hahaha.. Try it here @http://www.widmaenner.de/brain/

The book also said that male and female has different range of eye vision.. Really??!

Sengsaranya la haii nak cari  parking dekat midvalley ujung2 minggu ni. Kalo tak kerana janjiku.. tak hengen gak la aku nak datang midvali. Cheeewaah! Ayat hangen jek ni padahal midvali tu kubu aku. Apa taknya.. ari keje kat sana..ujung minggu pun lepak sana. Tapi kalo nak ikot, 2 jerk place yang paling convenient tok aku. Dekat & yang penting aku familiar.                     

Tapi now, kalo aku kuar.. aku kena ada dekat uamh before kol 4 sebab citer No Limit start kol 4 then Down Wif Lav kol 6.30. Astro aku ni bila la nak pasang. Lemau! Dulu aku tunggu sehari jek & on the spot dapat tengok dah, tapi kat cni kena tunggu 2 minggu...

Pagi ni aku 'terhadir meeting dengan pengarah & ketua2 unit. Aku tensih betol kalo teraniya wakil bos aku g miting. Aku ni ikan bilis jek. Sampai2 bilik miting, aku tanya one of the bos.. bule ke aku wakil miting ni. Kena tanya oii.. karang kena halau dek pengarah.. malu mak!

Half of my day da ilang sebab g miting. Petang tu aku jadik pelarian.. ahaha.. bertapa kat toilet lama2 sambil2 pakai mask. Ini gara2 adik aku la ni smalam. Kitaorang g buat site evaluation tapi end up melancong kat putrajaya sampai sun burn muka aku dibuatnya.

Aku nak citer pasal sk11 nih. Ari 2 aku terai la trial pack dengan rega 98 hengget. Dalam 2 ada face wash, toner ngan essence. Pencuci muka dia memang la amat best.. Essence 2 pn bt muka i raser haluz giteww. Tp memang best!

Maka.. Aku pun terbeli la set yg besau. Face wash berega 150 & essence berega 3 ratus lebey. Pecah la rekod aku yg slma ini pakai pencuci muka berega 10 hengget paling mahal, which kadang2 aku pakai shower cream or sabun badan jek as pencuci muka. Mahalll oke!

Sbb aku spent dekat 500 henget, maka aku entitle la dapat 1 trial pack. Dalam 2 ada facewash, toner & mask. Mask dia mmg mahveles! Sangat.. amat le mahveles.. xpecaiya.. cuba teraii. Rega satu keping yekla 48 or 43 henget oke! Kalo nak beli 1 pack which contain 5 masks..2 atus lebey la jugak.

Aku pon tak paham napa aku nak pakai skII ni..eish! ni semua pengaruh iklan la nih.

Aku takder mood nak buat keje hari ni.. padahal kerja aku tu meraung2 mintak ditengok. Tapi, ada aku kesah? ahahah.. best plak cakap macam nih. So, tengahari tu aku merayau2 la dekat bawah. Tetiba aku terberhenti dekat kiosk promotion New York Skin aper ntah nama dia.. aku dengan tak sengaja tertanya kat minah kat kaunter tu "slimming tak der ke"? ahahah

Amoi tu pun tanya member dia.. "London you meiyou?" Aku dengar dengan jelas la jawapan "Meiyou" kawan dia tu so aku pun nak ngangkat kaki dah la. Alih2 amoi tu cakap..miss, try la skin treatment.. RM38 saja.. 3 hours! What? 3 hours tu da buat aku da start tertarik menarik.. so, konversasi berikut telah berlaku di depan pintu masuk Carrefour

Amoi : Miss..cubala.. 3 hours treatment + trial pack + bag .. blablablabla
Aku : Tak maw la.. saya punya kulit sudah cantik maaa (...mengusap2 pipi gebus aku yang baru jek dua 3 ari terai SKII)
Amoi : Memang u kulit cantik, tapi sini gelap sikit kann (sambel tunjuk kat misai aku)
Aku : Ayo.. u tak baik... kesian i taww
Amoi : Hahaha.. Alaaa.. Trai la.. ada mystery gift lagi kena bagi percuma (dengan nada merayu2.. aww)

Bla bla bla..

Aku : RM38 saja ini semua for 3 hours of treatment?
Amoi :Yaaa.. Ini offer time promtion maa..

Amoi ni da nampak da jarum dia start nak masuk.. pastu  tiba2 member dia datang &kata kat aku

Member Amoi : Miss.. tapi ini treatment kan, at least untuk yang age 22 years and above..
Aku : Aiyyaa.. you ingat sy berapa umur?
Member Amoi : blurr
Aku : Ayiyoo.. sy 30 tahun loh!

Baru amoi2 tu tersengih2 cam kerang busuk.. ahahaha.

Aku salah pakai baju kot sampai nampak muder giteww! ahahahah.. aktuali.. selekeh sangat kot pakaian aku.. wahaha

View umah lama dari bilik aku..

Aktiviti skodeng orang mandi dari tingkap bilik.. memang pool area umah lama aku lagi cantik laa compare tu umah baru ni.

Zoom kat luar pagar tu.. yerr.. itu lah tempat aku parking, kat jalan raya. Kalo dulu aku berebut2 nak balik kol 4.30 sebab tanak besesak2 kat dalam komuter.. tis time aku berebutz balik awal gara2 tak sanggup nak berebut2 parking kat jalan raya pula.

Katil aku.. saper tak nampak imaginary katil aku tu memang tinggal 2 kali jumaat jek la. Aku ni memang spesis tak suka katil sebab aku alergik kalo ader barang bawah katil.

Library.... living room and kitchen aku.. ahah. Kat belakang tu gitar.. music corner, laundry area ngan 'main library ader kat belah kanan. Aku sangat gumbira sebab bilik baru aku ni besar.. senang aku nak Beli! Beli! Beli! barangggg..ahaha